I can't come to the phone now. So if, well, actually, I can come to the phone now. I mean, like, I'm at the phone now, recording this message, but I'm doing this now, while you're listening to it later. Except for you I guess it's now, like, when you're listening to it. I mean, like, wait.
IT STARTED OUT just like any normal day for … let’s call him Jimmy* … but little did he know he was destined to witness a group of old ladies beat up a man who had just crashed into them, with pepper spray, an umbrella and a bible!
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Parodying any government or secret service agency is also a great way to create funny voicemail messages. For instance, you could say, "Thank you for calling the Slovakian Consulate. All our diplomats are out changing lightbulbs, so at the sound of the tone, please leave your details and any international secret you may have for sale." Creating funny voicemail messages that sound like they are from the mafia, the FBI, the CIA, or even the IRS can be a cool way to greet your callers when you are not available.
-Hello, caller. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to leave your name, number, and a short message after the tone. This message will self destruct. BOOM! (not followed by a beep)
We’re all familiar with this type of voicemail greeting. Simply put, a caller reaches you by dialing your number or extension directly. For an optimal personal voicemail greeting, be clear about who you are, the team you’re on, and when the caller can expect a callback. Unlike company and department voicemail greetings, you may not be able to configure a greeting for open and closed business hours. If that’s the case, use a general voicemail greeting that accommodates both scenarios.
“In case you have forgotten, this is a machine – my owner does not want siding, the newspaper, or the carpets cleaned. He donates to charity through its office and do not want their picture taken. If you’re still with me, leave a message and we’ll see if he calls you back.”
(Bullwinkle) Hey, Rocky, somebody called while we weren't home. Watch me pull their message out of this machine. (Rocky) Again? (Bullwinkle) Nuthin' up my sleeve. Presto! Must have been a wrong number. (Rocky) Here's a chance for you to REALLY leave your message.
If you’re a small business owner, we recommend going with the RIY (record it yourself) route. First, it’s more affordable. Second (and more importantly), if your clients expect to work with you directly, they will expect to hear your voice when they place a phone call.
I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks.
A professional voicemail greeting is slightly different than a business greeting, as certain professionals may require the caller to leave specific information. For instance, a professional therapist voicemail greeting would specifically ask for contact information from the caller, as well as leave their own personal contact information in case the caller is having problems. Hello, thank you for calling the office of Dr. Harold Tweed. I can’t come to the phone right now; please leave your name, number, and message at the tone. If this is an emergency, please contact either my personal assistant at 555-555-2345 or myself at 555-555-3234 and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you for your call. Include your name/business Ask for their contact information and message Provide them with alternate phone numbers if this is a crisis Extend gratitude for their call Funny Voicemail Greeting
The President is not in his office at this time. Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password. Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us. Noland Voyd. I do NOT want greeting messages. Update 2: cind, that is funny lol. I'll have to try it sometime.
Oh, one more thing;Where do you say you live?Hi.I need some money if this is my parents.If this is my friend, I will give you your money.If this is a hot girl, don't listen to what I said before.
5. Away/Vacation Voicemail Greeting Samples. “Hello, this is [Name] at [Company.] I will be out of the office for the week of [dates]. Please leave your name, number, and the reason for your call, and I will reply within 24 hours of my return. If you prefer, you can try me on my cell, [number].
Hi you've reached the home of (name) also known as 007. If you get this machine I am probably saving the world. This tape will self destruct in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
25. "Hello! Thanks for reaching out to [company]. We're closed today for the holiday, and will reopen tomorrow. If you leave your name, number, and a brief message, we'll give you a call when we're back in the office. Thanks again, and have a great day."
Good voicemail greetings should include your name and/or company, your reason for missing the call or an apology, and instructions for leaving a message. How to Turn Your Customer Complaints into Business Benefits 50% of Business Owners Over 50 Back Trump's National Emergency Declaration How Zoho Bookings Helps Your Business Grow Square Seller Fees Stay Consistent as PayPal, Venmo Raise Rates Sponsored by Square Use Emojis in your Business Communications? Than Check Out These! How Can Your Alma Mater Help Your Small Business? Annie Pilon is a Senior Staff Writer for Small Business Trends, covering entrepreneur profiles, interviews, feature stories, community news and in-depth, expert-based guides. When she’s not writing she can be found on her personal blog Wattlebird, and exploring all that her home state of Michigan has to offer. Small Business Trends is an award-winning online publication for small business owners, entrepreneurs and the people who interact with them. Our mission is to bring you "Small business success, delivered daily."
Hello. You have reached Erin Klineman, Marketing Manager for Stone & Associates. I am currently out of the office attending a conference until August 4th. I will be checking messages daily, however, if you need immediate assistance, please contact Marketing Specialist, Michael Kim at extension 240. Otherwise, please leave a message, and I will call you back at my earliest opportunity.