“Holiday voicemail greeting is the perfect opportunity to personalize the usually neutral corporate communication.” 9 scripts for holiday voicemail greetings. Below we have listed several ideas for great voicemail messages, depending on your company’s needs. 1. Happy [X holiday]! You’ve reached [ …
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32. Hi, you’ve reached [your name] at [X company]. Our office is currently closed until [X date]. Please leave us your name and number, and our team will get back to you as soon as possible. Enjoy [X holiday].
Not sure if this is real or not (and either is snopes, see below). But, it sure is funny. Happy Monday! EDIT: Try this link. This is where I got it from, I didn't try the one below and it apparently doesn't work: Claim: Voicemail message describes a confrontation between a male motorist and four women after a minor traffic accident.
Don't mess with Bible-totin' old ladies.. Read this little explanation and then listen to the voicemail. You just have to laugh with the guy. On a recent Spurs trip, we were asking one of our sponsors who works at Jack in the Box for some funny stories or experiences with the company. The funniest story he had was when an operations manager was late for a meeting and called his boss to tell him he was running late. As he was leaving the voice mail message, he witnessed an accident and went on to provide "play by play" of the incident. After telling us the story, he promised to send us a copy of the voice mail and here it is. This is the actual voice mail message. It was passed along and forwarded so many times within Jack in the Box; it crashed their voice mail server. Origins: In one memorable episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family, Archie Bunker is involved in a minor traffic accident and, eager to cash in on the incident, rushes out and engages a Jewish lawyer to sue the other party. However, after conferring with the defendant's attorney, Archie's lawyer advises him that he has http://www.snopes.com/autos/graphics/fight.gif no case, as the other side's witnesses are too strong. There's an old legal precept, he informs Archie: "You can't beat a station wagon full of nuns." Perhaps Archie Bunker couldn't beat a station wagon full of nuns, but according to a circulating audio clip, an Impala full of Bible-toting middle-aged women could beat (literally!) the motorist who ran into them. We present the recording for your listening enjoyment through [url="http://www.snopes.com/autos/audio/jackbox.mp3"]this (http://home.swbell.net/kf5tv/voicemail.mp3) link. The file size of the clip is over 4MB, so please be patient while it downloads. As to the questions of whether the account given above is an accurate explanation of the origins of this audio clip, and whether the traffic incident described actually took place, we have to leave them as "Undetermined" for now. A inquiry posed to the corporate offices of Jack in the Box restaurants produced the following response: Thank you for your inquiry. The message that has been in circulation is an actual voice mail message. The incident occurred 5-6 years ago in Texas. I'm not sure how the recording got outside the company or if the employee still works for Jack in the Box, but the recording periodically re-surfaces on the radio and the internet. Even if this explanation is accurate (i.e., the clip originated as a message left on a Jack in the Box employee's voicemail), it doesn't preclude the possibility that the accident described never took place, and the recording was just a prank one employee pulled on a co-worker.
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Click On The Link To Read More About Parenting With Purpose Christianparenting Funny Mom Jokes Funny Mom Quotes Mom Life Quotes The best creative and funny voicemail messages along with professional voicemail greetings. funny answer phone messages, answer phone messages funny, funny phone answering messages, funny cell phone voicemail messages, funny cell phone messages, cell phone messages funny, cell phone funny text messages, funny cell phone text messages, free funny phone messages, funny phone messages, Labels: cell phone funny text messages, cell phone messages funny, free funny phone messages, funny cell phone text messages, funny phone messages
This sound begins with a dark unsteady thud. The following sharp sustained tone is layered by a silent Morse code ... 3-way-communication60HZ-AMproc.wav - mp3 version 3-way-communication60HZ-AMproc.wav - ogg version 3-way-communication60HZ-AMproc.wav - waveform 3-way-communication60HZ-AMproc.wav - spectrogram 78610.0
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Website: http://soundcommunication.holdcom.com/bid/83016/5-Examples-of-Funny-Voicemail-Greetings-why-you-should-avoid-them
9. Outgoing Message with Samuel L. Jackson Treatment. Stephen Colbert asked Samuel L. Jackson to record his infamous voice on his outgoing message recording.
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How to record or change your Android voicemail greeting in 10 simple steps. 1. Turn on your phone and launch the Phone app. Turn the power on for your phone. Then, tap the Phone app. 2. Open the dial pad. Tap the dial pad icon near the bottom of the screen to bring up your phone's dial pad. 3.
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You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly. What's the funniest/coolest/cleverest/favorite Answering Machine/Voicemail/Answerphone Messages you've heard, or even done yourself? In college my roomate was a cop, he told me that the worst things you can say on an answering machine were 1) telling them your name, 2) telling the caller your number, 3) and that you aren't at home. Well, here's what I did...
9. This is Dan Cassidy’s answering machine. Please leave your name and number, and after I’ve doctored the tape, your message will implicate you in a federal crime and be brought to the attention of the FBI.
5. Check your voicemail inbox. Once you're in your voicemail system, you may have to do things slightly differently than how they're done in this tutorial, depending on your telecom carrier and/or voicemail client.
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Christian Ideas for Voice Mail Messages. You can put a Christian spin on your voice mail message by quoting Scripture or by using a traditional blessing. The person who's trying to call you can be uplifted by your voice and his day will be spiritually enriched. If your voice mail is only for personal calls, you can inject some Biblical humor
Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.
More individuals have not set up their voice message nor return calls in a decent amount of time. However, some voice messages even steer individuals to contact by email for a quicker response. If you still enjoy the concept and position that a voicemail box serves, you may feel compelled to add a witty voicemail greeting to your caller. The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail. A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century.
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Just when we think things can’t get any more brutal, Jimmy tells of how the main assailant – the Godmother if you will – begins to unleash her savage beating:
You are dazed, bewildered, trapped in a world with no time, where color collides with sound, and shadows explode. You see a sign up ahead. This is no ordinary answering device; this is "The Twilight Phone."
Like I said earlier, 99.9% of voicemail greetings are exactly the same. Go outside the box and create a hilarious voicemail greeting. Comedic messages create a memorable experience, encourage word of mouth and keep your callers on the line. Seems like a winning formula to me.
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The invention of the smart phone changed the use and perception of telephone calls. Not only did mobile phones make home phones unnecessary for many, but the ability to send and receive text messages or emails on a smart phone made calls themselves feel unnecessary. Even in many workplaces, answering the phone is now either impossible due to nonstop time demands or discouraged by company cultures that prioritize digital communication. Whereas calls once stood out as important and sometimes fun, more people find them time-consuming and frustrating.
"John, this is Mark from Pinnacle. I've been working with Steve at JKY industries and It's urgent that I talk to you. You can reach me at 123 (pause 2 seconds) 456 (pause 1-2 second) 7890. That number again is 123.....456.....7890." Hangup.
If a telephone rings in an empty room and no one is there to answer it, was there really a phone call? Help me investigate this phenomenon by leaving your name and number after the tone.
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Hello, epicenter of the Universe, God speaking. If you leave your name, number, and prayer after the tone, I will call you back as soon as I can. Please note that I answer all prayers, but sometimes the answer is NO. Bless you, my child, and have a nice day.
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-So long as phones can ring and eyes can see, leave a message, and I’ll get back to thee.
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“Hi! You have reached [your business]. All of our staff are currently busy helping other callers. We understand how valuable your time is, and rather than keeping you on hold, we will make sure to call you back.Be sure to leave us a detailed message with your name and number. We will return your call within two business hours. Thanks!”
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Hey, this is ________, and I'm can't come to the phone right now, but don't mind me--You know what to do!
Concatenation of events preclude our coming to the phone. Please speak freely, with magniloquence upon occasion of the tone.
Download Ebook Funny Answering Machine Messages Funny Answering Machine & Voicemail Messages. In 1935, Willy Müller invented the world's first automatic answering machine. It was a three-foot-tall machine popular with Orthodox Jews who were forbidden to answer the phone on the Sabbath. Then in 1960, the Ansafone, created by
Hi, this is John's answering machine. He's not here, but I'm open to suggestions.
Greetings. You’ve reached the office of [Name]. I’m either out of the office or gone for the day. However, your call is extremely import to me, so I’d appreciate it if you’d leave your message, along with your contact information, at the sound of the beep. Thank you for your call.
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Thanks for calling Dial-A-Shrink. I can’t come to the phone right now, so after the tone, please leave your name and number, then talk briefly about your childhood and tell me what comes to mind when you hear the following words: orange… mother… unicorn… penis. I’ll get back to you with my diagnosis as soon as possible.
Custom voicemail greetings are essential. If you don’t have one, it makes your business look unprofessional and a little robotic. Be sure to include something that people will want to hear when they’re calling your business. Inspirational voicemail greetings mean a lot ot your callers, it lets them know you care. When it comes to business, voicemail is the most important form of communication.
“Believe it or not, George isn't at home, please leave a message at the beep. I must be out, or I'd pick up the phone. Where could I be? Believe it or not, I'm not home.” Click here to watch and listen to George’s hilarious voicemail sample.
This is a magic voicemail message. Leave a message. Leave a message at the beep. Oh, here it is. Hi, thanks for calling. If you need to reach me right away call my personal line as purposefully leave of one numberthat Hi, I am available to the phone right now but I take the calls in order of importance.
Now… now, the first step is, is the most important step there is. Liam Neeson has been acting for decades but it was his recent role in the hit movie Taken that caught the attention of a younger audience.
– Sorry, I can’t be everywhere, and sitting by the phone ready to take your call, just isn’t going to happen. The best thing to do is to leave your message and not be offended that I wasn’t able to speak with you. Thanks.
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The following greeting accomplishes this succinctly. Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone – The Work From Anywhere Business Phone System]. Our office is closed until [Monday, January 25th for the holiday weekend]. If your call is urgent, please contact [Anya at 212-555-1212 or [email protected] ].
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This sequence of synthesised piano notes starts off with the notes (A#, F - one perfect fifth up, and D# ... knocking and throbing at a roomdoor - mp3 version knocking and throbing at a roomdoor - ogg version knocking and throbing at a roomdoor - waveform knocking and throbing at a roomdoor - spectrogram 55320.0
But this time, why not try something different? Instead of keeping such serious messages, let us have some interesting and funny greetings. Keeping such hilarious greetings will not only make you feel good, but your callers will also enjoy listening to them.
2. Voxist. Voxist is one of the great visual voicemail that allows users to manage voicemails conveniently and smoothly, anywhere they go, and also let them read transcribed voicemail messages.
When I get back, and can listen to what you say, I will call you back but on a less hectic day! Help me please!!!! Just speak into this box, when it makes that weird sound, and I will be able to get out and call you back! This is name speaking. He donates to charity through its office and do not want their picture taken. So how about an early birthday present? These were some of the best and funny voice-mail greetings. Try recording them in your voice mailbox.
4. Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.
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A good voicemail greeting is short and professional, lets people know that you’ll get back to them, and invites callers to continue engaging with a call-to-action. You should also show your personality if you’re in an industry or role that allows that. If your industry is more conservative, however, you’ll want to keep humor and personal touches to a minimum. A greeting Your name Your company A simple explanation for missing the call (e.g. you’re away from the phone or are on holiday) A rough estimate of when you’ll get back to the person An alternative person to reach out to (if you’re out of office) An alternative mode of communication (if you prefer email or text) A call-to-action such as “Leave a message” or “Send me an email at [email protected]”
A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future…. A is for academics, B is for beer. So leave a message. After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. Finally get an answering machine. Now how does this thing work?
Hi! Jan's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
Hey guess who this is? You guessed it. Guess what you have to do now? You guessed it. Guess what's next? You guessed it.
Prepare for alpha test of Beep Software revision 1.05. Counting down to test: 5… 4… 3… 2… 1…
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Unfortunately, sometimes things get too busy in the salon for it to be possible to have a staff member only on reception duty. As a result, you rely on a salon voicemail greeting to do the job. But is it doing the job?
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Oh lord…is it you…again? Well, if you must, leave a name and number after the beep. I’ll try to return the call, if I can stand it, that is.
Now, here's where the embedded commands begin. I don't know if you've ever heard of Neurolinguistic Programming, NLP. I'm no Ninja at it, but I've learned a little bit about it through the years and if you can embed commands that aren't direct commands, not explicit, I'm commanding you to do this, but a subtle statement of a thing that embeds as a command to your subconscious mind, it can have an influencing effect on the other person.
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A word of warning: These greetings will not do you any favors if you're in the midst of a job hunt or work in a conservative industry. Always remember your target personas. If there's a chance they won't appreciate your sense of humor, opt for a straightforward greeting instead.
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Not everyone is not going to return your voicemail messages. However, by using these techniques you will certainly get a lot more callbacks than if you were to use the normal long winded and weak salesperson voicemail that is left by so many salespeople. Good luck! Win more clients by creating impressive digital business proposals, price quotes, and contracts using ClientPoint Software
-Hey you all, thanks for calling me today. It will be super nice if you would leave me a special and kind message so I’m encouraged to call you back.
Hello… my name is (your name)’s refrigerator. He/she isn’t home right now to take your call. To leave him/her a message, speak very slowly so I can stick the message with the help of these refrigerator magnets.
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The History of the Answering Machine » bit.ly/39sgo7a 88 Creative Answering Machine Messages » bit.ly/3whSrZI 21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages » bit.ly/3ub17iY
Hello, this is the Computer Music Research Institute of Portland, Oregon. We can't take your call at the moment, but we would like you to leave a critique of one of our current works in progress.