The point of a voicemail greeting is to encourage your callers to leave a message. More often than not, and this is becoming more evident every day, people are just hanging up and assuming the receiver will call back. On the other hand, funny voicemail greetings keep people on the phone longer. Given that you have already captured their attention and they have taken the time to listen to your greeting, they are certainly going to leave a message. This will not only remind you to return the call, but it also shows their interest in completing the home improvement project.
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Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital. If you need to reach a patient, please press 1 and then say their name. If you are delusional, please have either you or your monkey press 2and we will connect you to Mothership.
Once you finish your voicemail message, you can end on a note of gratitude and express thanks or that you realize the recipient of the message us busy, so you’d appreciate a return call. Whichever way you choose, make certain that the tone of your message is upbeat. A business voicemail greeting sees each call as their chance to engage with their clients or vendors. Hello, you’ve reached the office of Lydecker and Lydecker. We are currently unavailable to answer your call. However, your call is important to us, so please leave your name, phone number or email address, and a brief message and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you for your interest in Lydecker and Lydecker Law Offices. Professional tone Provide the caller with specific information Request the caller to leave specific information Extend gratitude for their call Professional Voicemail Greetings
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I call bullshit. Why does he start describing what the guy is wearing when he gets out of the car?
Hi, this is Stephanie's answering machine. If you're the phone company asking for money, stop bugging her, she'll send it sooner or later. If you're a TV company advertising TVs, she already has a TV with every channel known to man, and several known to monkeys. If you called for any other reasons, please hang up the phone, start screaming, and run to the nearest shoe store. When you get there, ask them for a cheeseburger. (This probably won't help you, but we'll always have something to laugh about when we're bored.)
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This is a true story: my friend's voicemail says, "Hi, you've reached Dave, I'm screening your call." My friend is a recent college graduate, currently searching for a job. While your best friends might think it's funny, anyone else will see a message like this for what it is: unnecessarily rude.
Caller ID and missed call alerts now serve as their own form of call messaging. People can see who called. They assume they need to contact you. It’s much faster to scroll through a list of incoming callers than to listen to recorded messages. Some people even use audio-to-text transcription options in their cars or from their mobile phones that turn voice messages into notes.
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Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back. If your one of your name 's friends, you may also leave a message at the They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail.
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Recognize Their Need. When someone calls your business, the voicemail should give them a sense of validation. This means that your voicemail should extend gratitude for their interest in your business, or an apology for not being there to answer your call. These two simple courtesies can go a long way in the creation or establishment of client/business trust. Make it Informative for the Caller. Your voicemail must include all the information the customer will need for your particular business. For instance, if you’re a brick and mortar establishment, it’s wise to include your store hours. It’s also a good idea to leave them an alternate way to contact you, especially if it’s after hours. After all, you don’t want to miss just one potential customer. Here are some suggestions for elements to include in your voicemail: Business name Hours (if brick and mortar) Alternate method of contact, such as email Your name
what are funny voicemail greetings
Who is this?! How did you get this number?! If you are a friend, trying to give us money or just want to talk, then leave a message or try my cell phone number. But you can tell me all of that in the message you leave me.
Always keep in mind the people who will be listening to your professional voicemail greetings. What type of tone and information resonates with them?
“Good morning. You’ve reached the voicemail of [your name]. Today is [date]. Please leave me a message with your name and contact information. Oh, and here’s my motivational quote of the day: [read quote].”
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He’s hit him in the head with the bible. She picked the bible up and lifted it way over her head…and she’s still beating the hell out of this guy. She picked this bible up and raised it above her head and beamed the guy.
Hey before you leave that message, do you want to know something about me? I love jokes. You want to know something I hate?
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7. 605–475–6958: How to decide whether you are sober. Are you unable to tell whether you are drunk or sober? (that should be a hint in itself.) Feel free to enlist the help of the Sobriety Test hotline.
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4. Liam Neeson Threatens and Delights Your Callers. Liam Neeson has been acting for decades but it was his recent role in the hit movie Taken that caught the attention of a younger audience.
When your business is closed for vacation or holidays, it’s imperative that you set appropriate expectations for a callback and to provide an alternative coverage option, if available. The following greeting accomplishes this succinctly.
9. This is Dan Cassidy’s answering machine. Please leave your name and number, and after I’ve doctored the tape, your message will implicate you in a federal crime and be brought to the attention of the FBI.
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It starts off pretty normal until Jimmy witnesses said car accident while speaking:
what is personal voicemail greeting
In other words, voice mail isn’t dead yet for veterinarians. Let’s consider strategies to make your voice mail messages effective. Always strive to move the conversation forward, even if that’s simply to let clients know: The best times to reach you When you’ll try to call again How to connect with you in other ways (email or text message)
best professional voicemail greetings examples
January 19, Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers: No one answers phone calls anymore; send me a text.
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Jimmy pulled over while on his way to Dallas to give his friend Mark a call. Alas Mark didn’t answer so Jimmy decides to leave him a voicemail.
best professional voicemail greetings
Good day, you have reached the office of [Name]. I’m away for the weekend. If you require my immediate assistance, please call 555-555-2345. Otherwise, if this is a casual call, please leave your name, number and a brief message, and I’ll get back to you on Monday.
hi JP, I loved it and appreciate any help I can get. I thought it was awesome. Concise and to the point but adaptable to my business model as I’m a solopreneur but life long NE Ohioan. Can i use my dog as my family??? I meet alot of people on walks with him as he is uber cute and friendly. Let you know how it goes. Have a great day! Home Privacy Policy Terms of Use Cancellation Policy Contact Us Members Login Sitemap
Home / Funny Answering Machine Messages / Funny Answering Machine Messages - Page 2
If I’m your best friend, that’s not a problem. But otherwise, I have no idea if I’m leaving a message for the right person or not. Was that his voice? I couldn’t tell. It kinda sounded like Micheal Cera. Did I accidentally just call Michael Cera’s phone? “Hey if this is Alex, it’s Bryan Allain…call me back. And if this is Michael Cera, loved you in Year One. You may also call me back.”
Funny Answering Machine & Voicemail Messages In 1935, Willy Müller invented the world’s first automatic answering machine. It was a three-foot-tall machine popular with Orthodox Jews who were forbidden to answer the phone on the Sabbath.
Live long and prosper. Click here to listen to the Star Trek voicemail greeting on Youtube. Hello, can you hear me? Hello from Ellen. Click here to hear how Hepburn brings these words to life. So please, leave a message at the sound of the beep… for the sake of anthropology. Hopkins later said that Hepburn's voice was, in part, the basis for Hannibal Lecter's voice in Silence of the Lambs.
Many times, when we call our friends, family members, or any other places, all we get is the voicemail. But when that message on the other side of the line is plain, it can really put someone off. You voice message greetings are supposed to be fun, energetic, and witty so that the callers want to pick up their phones and give you a call just so they can listen to the greeting again.
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Pressing 3 is optional. This is David. Please leave one. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. I am not in the office today; I may not be in tomorrow.Need some ideas for funny voicemail greetings? Our users have volunteered their best greetings that are guaranteed to bring a chuckle to your callers:. Our previous post on funny voicemail greetings got so much attention, we thought we'd continue….
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These guys do it all. They have a voice-over service (including writing the greeting script) and transfer the greeting to your phone in super high quality. I couldn’t find anything better online anywhere. https://www.okcvideoproduction.com/record-high-quality-voicemail-greeting Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Check out all posts
So my dad called me and I missed the call, on my voice mail greeting I say to leave your name and number and I'll get back to you.
Caller ID also played a role in the decline of calls answered by making it easier to know which calls to reject.
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2. Hi, I’m not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
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Businesses should have two main types of greetings to create an excellent call experience. The first one is what we call a “welcome greeting” – this greeting welcomes callers to your business. Typically, a welcome greeting will present a menu of call options like hours, location, or customer service. For more details on how to create a welcome greeting for your general business number, read this article.
How did you get this number?! If you are a friend, trying to give us money or just want to talk, then leave a message or try my cell phone number. But you can tell me all of that in the message you leave me. So, haha funny story, my phone and I are playing hide and seek….
Good voicemail greetings should include your name and/or company, your reason for missing the call or an apology, and instructions for leaving a message. How to Turn Your Customer Complaints into Business Benefits 50% of Business Owners Over 50 Back Trump's National Emergency Declaration How Zoho Bookings Helps Your Business Grow Square Seller Fees Stay Consistent as PayPal, Venmo Raise Rates Sponsored by Square Use Emojis in your Business Communications? Than Check Out These! How Can Your Alma Mater Help Your Small Business? Annie Pilon is a Senior Staff Writer for Small Business Trends, covering entrepreneur profiles, interviews, feature stories, community news and in-depth, expert-based guides. When she’s not writing she can be found on her personal blog Wattlebird, and exploring all that her home state of Michigan has to offer. Small Business Trends is an award-winning online publication for small business owners, entrepreneurs and the people who interact with them. Our mission is to bring you "Small business success, delivered daily."
Hi, you have reached Angela, Senior Recruitment Specialist. If you are calling to inquire about the status of your application, you can access that information by logging into your account on our online portal, where you applied. Due to the high volume of applications we receive, it is not possible to respond directly to all applicants, only to those whose candidacy is being pursued. For additional information on our recruitment process and what you can expect, please review the FAQ page on our website. If you need immediate assistance, please call back and dial extension 6 for the Human Resources receptionist, or you can leave a message, and I will return your call. Thank you.
01Hello this is [your name], I’m either on another call or away from my desk. Please leave your details, along with a short message and I’ll get back to you. This is created by individual staff for their specific number or extensions. It’s a great voicemail greeting for work when you are on another line or away from your desk.
Hello. This is Ron's answering machine, Marvin, and I'm SO depressed. I have 50,000 times the memory capacity of my owner, but all I get to do is answer the phone. Life. Don't talk to me about life. Just leave your name and number after the beep. Here comes the beep, God how I hate that beep, it's so cheery sounding.
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Read Poems Contests Winners Poetry By Topics Read Quotes List of Poets Discussion Forums More Writing Tips Administration Contact Us Sign-In Name : Jayde Status : Regular Member Joined : Dec 1, 2004 Posts : 61 "I'm away, taking over the world with an army of crazed penguins. Leave a message, but it probably won't matter when the whole world has been enslaved by the Penguin Lord and I am elected the Penguin Goddess. Have a nice day." "I'm not here right now, if you'd like to reach me on my cell phone, buy me a cell phone." "I am the cookie monster's secret sidekick, and as the cookie monster's secret sidekick I am required to eat all the cookies. BRB." "I'm an alien from outer space and I'm having sex with your eyeballs and you like it cuz you're smiling." If you have any more add them. I'd love to see what anyone can come up with or find. Reply Name : aaron 1 remo Status : Regular Member Joined : Nov 18, 2005 Posts : 312 ' hello...................hello..................hey who is this?............... hahahahahahaha you were just talking to a machine moron!' That was mine for quite a while untill I started to get worried messages from my nanna 'Aaron?, Aaron what happened? are you all right? did you just get mugged Aaron?!!!' Bless her Name : Italian Stallion Status : Senior Member Joined : Jun 16, 2005 Posts : 8266 "Thank you for calling 911 our offices are closed because everyone is at the donut shop....." "Greetings, this is science officer spock, currently there are no life forms avalable to take your call ...." Name : christina marie Status : Senior Member Joined : Aug 8, 2005 Posts : 964 of receiving messages My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity at the office and don't need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and home phone number and they will get back to you. think about your name, your number, and your reason for calling... and I'll think about returning your call. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets. up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you back. Name : melly xx Status : Regular Member Joined : May 3, 2005 Posts : 508 Name : HOLLY ARMER Status : Senior Member Joined : Apr 29, 2004 Posts : 2620 Hi, this is ________. If you want to leave a message, please wait for the tone. If you want to leave your name and number, please press pound, press 3, then dial your name, then press 6 and dial your number. If you want to leave your name and just a message, press star, press 6, ask for extension 4443, then leave your name and message. If you want to leave your number and the time you called, please press star twice, spin in a circle, press 1 twice, talk loud and BEEP Name : Void Status : Senior Member Joined : Aug 12, 2005 Posts : 835 Name : Amanda Renee Status : Regular Member Joined : Feb 20, 2006 Posts : 214 my friends is as follows... it goes... Hello... and waits a couple seconds and then it says how are you doing today? and then if you reply it says good... then it waits then you ask it a couple ?? if ur like me when i heard it i answered him and well then he goes well hey i guess i better go and i was like what he goes bye and then finally he says glad i got to talk to you on my voice mail talk soon and i will call you back' About Scholarship Entertainment Scholarship About Us Contact Us Privacy Policy Terms and Conditions How Do I Create Funny Voicemail Messages? Join the Community Lakshmi Sandhana Lakshmi Sandhana Some individuals like to create funny voicemail messages for people to hear when they call.
This page is dedicated to the best of what the net has to offer in terms of funny and witty voicemail messages! Impersonations and much more... voicemail messages that are certainly not professional, but entertaining and fun! Enjoy!
These voicemail ideas may not come so easily for some of you. And who says that finding inspiration is a bad thing. It has to be different and contain some kind of style. And to that, I would like to give you a list of messages. They are perfect alternatives when you want to add some uniqueness to your voicemail. These cool voicemail ideas given below will take the mundane effects off and leave you with fresh sounding voicemail messages.
Hello, you've reached 555-1552, the Apartment at the End of the Universe. Please leave your message, name and number at the sound of the tone. Keep your hands, feet, extremities, and obscenities inside the car at all times. Enjoy your ride.
Professional voicemail greetings for work can be critical for giving your business a good level of credibility. By using one of our ready-made messages, you can save yourself time and impress the other party.
Leaving a voicemail can still be a good way to grab the attention of a potential new customer. However, when it comes to leaving a voicemail, you only have a few seconds to actually grab the listener's attention. Most salespeople screw this up by leaving too much information and making themselves sound like a salesperson, which is the kiss of death when leaving a voicemail.
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(make a little noise in the background). Hi, you’ve reached your friend’s house. He/she isn’t home right now and I took the opportunity to rob it. I was about to steal the machine as well and you called. After the beep, leave your name and number. I will write it on a post-it and leave it on the refrigerator for him/her to see. Oh and one more thing; where did you say you lived?
Hello, this is the Brown residence. We're in the middle of a family fight right now. Leave your name and number at the beep and whoever wins will call you right back.
YES. I'm happy to also share my ‘we buy houses' voicemail script with you…a time-tested, proven motivated seller voicemail script I crafted and fine-tuned for 18+ years now.
1. Hello and thank you for calling GetVoIP! We are closed today for the holiday, and will be back in the office tomorrow, Thursday the 14th. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause, but expect a prompt response from us tomorrow! Happy holidays and have a great day.
6. Pre-Recorded Message Playback. The Perfect Single Businessperson Solution. One Mailbox That Can Transfer Your Callers To Any Phone Of Yours, As Well As Voicemail And Fax To Email.
I know you're angry because I never answer your phone.So, to fix this, I think you guys should give me a birthday present: cell phone..(Make a little noise in the background ).Hi, you are already at your friend's house.
