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funny voicemail greetings for telemarketers
24. "Thank you for calling [company]. We're closed for [holiday] from [date] until [date]. Please leave your message and we'll get back to you as soon as possible. Have a happy holiday season!"
About the AuthorLenny Zeltser develops products and programs that use security to achieve business results. He is the CISO at Axonius and Faculty Fellow at SANS Institute. Lenny has been leading efforts to establish resilient security practices and solve hard security problems for over two decades. A respected author and practitioner, he has been advancing tradecraft and contributing to the community. His insights build upon real-world experience, a Computer Science degree from the University of Pennsylvania, and an MBA degree from MIT Sloan.
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21. Hello, this is [your name]. I’m not much of a phone person, so don’t bother leaving a message. Send me an email at [email address] and I’ll get back to you within 24 hours.
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This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. If you don't wish this call to be monitored or recorded, then please let the answering machine know when you leave your message.
Hi. This is Kevin and Diana's vacuum cleaner. Their appliances have switched jobs again, and I get to answer the phone 'cause my old job sucked. So leave a message after you hear the beep, and you can be sure it's in the bag.
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"Uh...had a slight weapons malfunction. But, uh, everything's perfectly all right now. We're fine. We're all fine here...now...thank you. How are you?" cromagnon, May 26, 2003 Joined: Jul 27, 2002 Messages: 1,463 You have reached the room of Matt and Brad. I am busy throwing Brad out the window (scream, quickly diminishing), so please leave a message. We had to try about 6 times before we didn't laugh while making it. Our RA came in and asked if everything was alright from my screaming.
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So take a look at some funny greetings that you can use as your funny cell phone voicemail ideas (or home phone). HI, you’ve reached (name). I’m so sorry I can’t pick up the call right now because I am standing right behind you. GOTCHA. My ass and I are out for a walk. So as soon as I can get my ass back in the house, I’ll give you a call. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z About US
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Creating a professional voicemail greeting isn’t complicated, but you need to keep a few things in mind to ensure success. The following tips will help: Be friendly and welcoming - let your company's personality shine!; Have a clear voice, speak at a slow to moderate pace, minimize background noise; Ensure the greeting is human and approachable; Keep the greeting short and informative; Ensure the greeting doesn’t sound robotic or unnatural; Show your gratitude for the call by saying thank you; Manage expectations by clearly stating when the client can expect a callback.
No3: Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped with her tape deck, so I'm stuck taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone.
5.) If you’re calling a home line, and know the family, it’s nice to say a group “Hello” before leaving a message specifically for the person you called. Say something like this: “Hi everyone, it’s Maralee. Hope you’re enjoying Spring Break! Janet, I wanted to see if you and I could meet for lunch one day next week. My schedule is pretty open, and we could pick a restaurant near your office. I know your lunch schedules are tight. I’ll give you a call back at 7:00 tonight. Or I’m around all afternoon, so give me a call!” (Boy, home lines are becoming rare, aren’t they? We gave ours up a couple of months ago.)
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Hello, this is Jason's voice. Jason's not here right now -- hey, haven't you ever lost your voice? Well, believe you me, when I find him again, I'll have a few choice words for him. If you do too, leave them after the beep.
No18: I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks.
Recognize Their Need. When someone calls your business, the voicemail should give them a sense of validation. This means that your voicemail should extend gratitude for their interest in your business, or an apology for not being there to answer your call. These two simple courtesies can go a long way in the creation or establishment of client/business trust. Make it Informative for the Caller. Your voicemail must include all the information the customer will need for your particular business. For instance, if you’re a brick and mortar establishment, it’s wise to include your store hours. It’s also a good idea to leave them an alternate way to contact you, especially if it’s after hours. After all, you don’t want to miss just one potential customer. Here are some suggestions for elements to include in your voicemail: Business name Hours (if brick and mortar) Alternate method of contact, such as email Your name
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Hello, this is John’s answering machine reminding you that yesterday was the last day of the previous period of your life. After the beep you can tell me how it was, or leave some other, informative message. Thanks.
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I love jokes. You want to know something I hate? Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital.
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A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd Century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future….
Saying that your have available slots for Thursday can be tricky, and also requires more work on your end, as you will need to keep relentlessly updating your salon voicemail message to adapt it. However you should give the time when you are next open. Remember to give your web address if guiding your clients to book online.
If you need to reach a patient, please press 1 and then say their name. If you are delusional, please have either you or your monkey press 2and we will connect you to Mothership.
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-Hi, this is ______. I’m sorry I can’t answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.
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Your voicemail is important. Keep in mind, this is essentially one of the first impressions the hiring manager will have from you. You need to make sure your voicemail is as professional as possible. Whether you are trying to be funny, trying to show off your singing abilities or shouting in the car with the windows down, chances are the hiring manager won’t be impressed. Go into a quiet room and record a simple, “Hi, you’ve reached Kim Costa. I’m sorry I missed your call, but if you please leave your name, number and a brief message I will get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks!” You really can’t go wrong with this. Trust me when I say that hiring managers probably don’t want to hear your high school’s fight song.
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Funny - Humorous voicemail greetings for your amusement and use. Professional - Voicemail messages that you can use in an office or business setting. Short - Voicemail greetings that are quick and get straight to the point.
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While email and text support saw an increase in recent years, many customers, partners, and potential hires still prefer to call your company directly. When writing your voicemail script, include basic information such as a short greeting, your company name, an invitation to leave a short message, and the time frame in which the caller can expect a return call. If relevant, you may want to include your office hours, extensions for company departments, and the contact information for your office manager or HR department.
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My owner your name here does not need siding windows or a hot tub, and her carpets are clean.
4. Www.makeuseof.com. Thanks A Lot. Professional Greetings For Office Or Work Purposes, Formal Greetings Are Appropriate. Why Not Try Something Different And Get Motivated By The Following Greetings?
This call is from a couple of kids that decided to leave a prank on my voicemail. They are acting like they are being attacked by a vampire bat. This kid has left me pranks in the past also.
The longer it gets, the more likely your potential client will hang up because they are annoyed.
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Whether you're in a long-distance relationship or just missing your guy, let him know how you feel with a sweet voicemail. If you can't be with your guy, but want to let him know you're thinking of him, a cute voicemail is the perfect solution.
This is a magic voicemail message. Leave a message. Leave a message at the beep. Oh, here it is. Hi, thanks for calling. If you need to reach me right away call my personal line as purposefully leave of one numberthat Hi, I am available to the phone right now but I take the calls in order of importance.
Like, right before you recorded this greeting you realized how dumb it would be to leave instructions. But you still wanted me to know how dumb it would be for you to leave instructions, so you wasted 20 seconds of my time telling me that you already knew I would know how to do it.
You could use this website as a free voice over generator for narrating your videos in cases where don't want to use your real voice. You can also adjust the pitch of the voice to make it sound younger/older, and you can even adjust the rate/speed of the generated speech, so you can create a fast-talking high-pitched chipmunk voice if you want to.
You have reached the office of [Business Name]. All of our representatives are currently busy. However, if you choose to do so, you may leave a brief message, including your name, number, or email, and we’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you for calling [Business Name].
Thank you for sharing your info. I really appreciate your efforts and I will be waiting for your further post thank you once again.
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“Hi. This is (name). If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn’t lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don’t worry, I have plenty of money. Bye!”
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Who is this?! How did you get this number?! If you are a friend, trying to give us money or just want to talk, then leave a message or try my cell phone number. But you can tell me all of that in the message you leave me. So, haha funny story, my phone and I are playing hide and seek…. Hey before you leave that message, do you want to know something about me? I love jokes. You want to know something I hate? Wanna hear a joke? Knock, knock! Hello, and thank you for calling the Starstripe Mental Hospital.
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No18: I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks.
Hi! I seem to be in the room, but I can’t quite locate my phone at the moment. If you leave a message and number, I’ll ring you up whenever I find it, or if you happen to know where I left it, let me know!
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Informal voicemail greetings are those that don’t adhere to the rules of professional and business voicemail greetings. Here, you are free to just leave a simple greeting, or use it to show your more witty side. This style of greetings can be used for both home and business if you like, depending on the type of caller you expect.
No47: This is you-know who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what you-know-when.
A long time back I found all the AT&T voice pieces in a set of .wav files. I made an answering machine message that said, "I'm sorry... the number you have dialed xxx-xxxx is no longer in service. You can reach your party at their new number, 911." Something to that affect. I don't think many people even got to my phone number before they hung up. I changed it shortly thereafter.
9. OK, so I followed all the instructions that came with the machine. I pressed all the necessary buttons. So… now what? I… am… so… confused. Could you please… beep.
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Also, during your script video, you stated that your postcard mentions that the seller's initial call will only be answered by an automated service, but on the “Here's one of Our Favorite Postcards” screenshot, the actual verbage is, “Call [this number] and I'll be happy to talk with you. If I'm out, please leave a message and I will call you shortly.” [no mention as to why you'd call anybody “shortly”, but that's prolly not the hill i wanna die on right now].
When leaving your voicemail and phone number, do not say, "Please call me back at ..." Nothing sounds more like a salesperson making a cold call then saying, "please call me back at...".
Being that I have been at Holdcom for a few months now, I decided it was time to change my cell phone voicemail greeting to something a bit more polished. Keep in mind, I have had the same voicemail message for probably 6 years, just transferring the same greeting every time I would get a new... All posts Next
21 Funny Answering Machine (Voicemail) Messages | Laugh Break Her answering machine just eloped with her tape deck, so I'm stuck with taking her calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just This is not an answering machine.
1. Hello and thank you for calling GetVoIP! We are closed today for the holiday, and will be back in the office tomorrow, Thursday the 14th. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause, but expect a prompt response from us tomorrow! Happy holidays and have a great day.
When unable to answer the phone, a voicemail message can be important. Below are examples of what to say in a voicemail message. Whether recording the message for a personal phone or a business line, these ideas will help.
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I love the thought process and NLP language put into the script. Very smart & clever!
If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handi- work, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone.Usually what I think is funny most of the timeis when my friends or family, after the beep, say "hello? Hey, how are you? Just wanted to let you know that I'm not here so leave a message! It gets everyone every freakin time because it makes it seem like you answered, but then they realize a few seconds later after they already started talking to you that you didn't.
Press record button, I did that, and the light should be on. Hmmmm, I wonder what this button does……. This call may be recorded or monitored for quality and training purposes. Hello you are talking to a machine; I am capable of receiving messages. My owner your name here does not need siding windows or a hot tub, and her carpets are clean.
Your business depends on customer engagement, and voicemail messages are a large part of that engagement. A voicemail is nothing more than a digital recording system, where messages are stored for you to retrieve later. Voicemail allows you to be able to connect with customers while you are away or during your off-hours, where they can drop off a message while you are gone. A voicemail greeting, on the other hand, refers to the message that your callers hear upon answering the phone.
While your best friends might think it's funny, anyone else will see a message like this for what it is: unnecessarily rude. Loud heavy-metal music in background; raspy voice: Hello, this is the executioner. Do you want your voicemail returned? Saying goodbye to a friend like you is like saying goodbye to my own soul — it is just not possible. Give him a reason to smile and think about you with a fun message he won't forget. And as the old adage reminds us, first impressions are everything.
In other words, voice mail isn’t dead yet for veterinarians. Let’s consider strategies to make your voice mail messages effective. Always strive to move the conversation forward, even if that’s simply to let clients know: The best times to reach you When you’ll try to call again How to connect with you in other ways (email or text message)
