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If you are a burglar, then we’re probably at home cleaning our weapons right now and can’t come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren’t home and it’s safe to leave us a message.

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Hi, you've reached the home of George Ledec. If you are calling to collect a student loan, gambling debt, or other obligation, please press 1 and hang up now. If you are selling any product or service, or requesting charitable donations, please press 2 and hang up now. Otherwise, press 3 and leave your message now. Pressing 3 is optional.
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The following selection has been shared by others around the global and intended to inspire you to create your own unique humorous voicemail.
Zombies doing whatever zombies do when they are feeling exultant and joyous...about brains. eerie spooky horror dreamlike Halloween uneasy strange distant ambient haunted abandoned - mp3 version abandoned - ogg version abandoned - waveform abandoned - spectrogram 59521.1

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Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password. Please leave a message.
If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handi- work, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone.Usually what I think is funny most of the timeis when my friends or family, after the beep, say "hello? Hey, how are you? Just wanted to let you know that I'm not here so leave a message! It gets everyone every freakin time because it makes it seem like you answered, but then they realize a few seconds later after they already started talking to you that you didn't.

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3. (858) 651-5050: Beautiful phrases. When looking for random phone numbers to call, it does not get funkier than this one. Dialing this line allows you to listen to what sounds like the most well-thought poem ever written.

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Holiday Voicemail Script Sample. Thank you for calling ABC Company. We are currently closed for the holiday. Our normal business hours are 8 am to 8 pm, eastern time, Monday through Friday. Your call is very important to us. Please leave your name, phone number, and a brief message regarding your …

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    Hello! This is 1-800-PRESLEY. Yes! 1-800-PRESLEY! They say the King died 10 years ago, but we know he's still out there somewhere. So... Leave your name and number and tell us where YOU saw Elvis!

    Information: Your business voicemail should provide all the information the caller needs. ...Validation: A great professional voicemail greeting should thank the caller for their call and apologize for missing it. ...Motivation: The aim of a professional voicemail is to keep the caller on the line long enough to listen to your message. ...
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    Of course, you NEED a voicemail greeting for the times your salon is closed at least. Here’s a checklist of best practices.

    "Hello. No one's home and the answering machine isn't working. This is the refrigerator. Please leave your message with me and I'll stick it to myself with this magnet. Thank you." MacRumors attracts a broad audience of both consumers and professionals interested in the latest technologies and products. We also boast an active community focused on purchasing decisions and technical aspects of the iPhone, iPod, iPad, and Mac platforms.
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    2. The “I’m Busy But I’ll Call Back” Greeting. Thank you for calling [insert business name], we are unavailable at the moment right now, probably trying to finish your project.

    Obviously, I need to update it. And if you haven't changed your voicemail greeting in over a year, you're likely in the same boat.
    Liam Neeson has been acting for decades but it was his recent role in the hit movie Taken that caught the attention of a younger audience. A self-proclaimed “first fan ever,” politely asked Liam on The Graham Norton Show to record her voicemail message greeting. Being the great guy that he is, the star humbly complied but added a fun and unexpected close to the recording.

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    1. The Lever. A lever is a bit of information that shows you know what you’re talking about and how to leave a message in a way that convinces them this isn’t a cold call.

    First, I'd like to pay all your closing costs. When you sell your property. To me, this will save you thousands of dollars because normally when you sell your home, I'm just trying to speak to their subconscious mind, sell your property, sell your home, sell your house to me, sell your house to me. It's not overt to them, but I'm being intentional about not just saying that, but subtly emphasizing those embedded commands.
    30. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m currently out of the office and will return on [X date]. If your call requires urgent attention, please call [Name] at [phone number] and they’ll be happy to assist you. If not, leave a message and I’ll return your call when I get back.

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Business voicemail greetings are likely to vary by company. Consider these specifics to create a professional voicemail greeting that works for your needs.

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Many times, salon voicemail messages only take away from your remarkable customer service and without the wanted result: drive clients in for an appointment. This is why we do not recommend getting into this habit, even if we are fully aware it sometimes seems like the only available option.

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No one wants to hear that they have been fired, but hey, it happens, and you’re...

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No7: You have reached 934-2435. We picked this machine up at a garage sale in "as-is" condition. You can try to leave a message on it, but we are not sure it will be recorded. If we don't return your call, it means the machine did not work.

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