Wow – I just read what I typed and even I can't make sense of the prolix drivel. However, I'm in no shape to attempt anything better so give it the old college try and let me know what you make of it. I'm expecting an entertaining, yet informative response, but I would certainly understand a visit from a cpl of guys wearing white lab coats driving an unremarkable, windowless van :/
Rehearse or write down your message before recording it. Remember that old saying “practice makes perfect?” It’s certainly true when it comes to creating an electronic greeting. The more you’ve rehearsed, the easier the message will be to restate. If you don’t have time to practice, writing down the greeting before recording it – and then reading it aloud from the paper – may help you stay focused on the correct wording.
.
10. Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I’ll be right with you. You are half-way there.
Sound upbeat in your message. When recording, be sure to say your message with a smile on your face. It’s obvious when people aren’t happy in their message. Since your work revolves around keeping happy customers, do your part by keeping a happy-sounding voicemail message.
Funny voicemail greetings are just that. These types of greetings have no rules whatsoever. They’re just for funsies, so make those you care for the laugh. Most of the time, they are personal, but certain businesses can use them as well. Perhaps you operate a theatrical costume company that specializes in clown memorabilia, or perhaps you run a business that sells pranks, such as plastic puppy poo, and whoopee cushions.
If your phone has a Lady Gaga ring-back tone, then I can’t guarantee I’ll wait for you to answer. 5. …I would thank you for calling, but I haven’t heard what you have to say yet. Just kidding! I’ll return your call as soon as possible. Thanks! 6. …If you’re Jennifer Lawrence, call my emergency line. (Insert your celebrity crush
My owner your name here does not need siding windows or a hot tub, and her carpets are clean.
6. Full Waiting Queue Message. What the caller hears when the waiting queue is full. Sample Scripts: “We are currently experiencing high call volume. Please leave a message with your name and phone number and we will return your call as soon as possible.”
18. "Hi, you've reached [your name]. I'm away from [date] to [date]. If you need help with [X] before then, please contact [name] at [phone number]. Everyone else, please leave your name and number and I'll return your call when I return. Thanks and have a great day."
Hello. This is Ron's answering machine, Marvin, and I'm so depressed. I have 50,000 times the memory capacity of my owner, but all I get to do is answer the phone. Life. Don't talk to me about life. Just leave your name and number after the beep. Here comes the beep, Gosh how I hate that beep, it's so cheery sounding.
Keep in mind that to enjoy the full benefits of your professional greeting system, you must routinely check and delete messages. If your voicemail fills up, you won’t be able to receive new messages, meaning your customers will become frustrated.
1. If you are a burglar, then we’re probably at home cleaning our weapons right now and can’t come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren’t home and it’s safe to leave us a message.
Now, here's where the embedded commands begin. I don't know if you've ever heard of Neurolinguistic Programming, NLP. I'm no Ninja at it, but I've learned a little bit about it through the years and if you can embed commands that aren't direct commands, not explicit, I'm commanding you to do this, but a subtle statement of a thing that embeds as a command to your subconscious mind, it can have an influencing effect on the other person.
Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you. Hello, you have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep. Hi, this is [ your name ]. I’m sorry, I can’t answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone …
Marketing Messages (617) 527-3023 [email protected] Page 6 The application then asks the patient if he/she has less than 20 days of supplies for medical items used by diabetics - such as masks, filters, tubing and test strips - and gives him/her the ability to re-order.
Legal InformationTerms of UsePrivacy PolicyDo Not Sell My Personal InformationCalifornia Privacy Notice Pillsbury Doughboy Obituary Calvin & Hobbes Snowman Cartoons Excerpts from Court Reporters Funny Easter Cartoons UPS Pilot Complaints Funny Computer Cartoons Colorado Barbie New Business Terms Funny Christmas Cartoons Finding Nemo End-of-the-Year Evaluations Asterisk Ian McKellen on Extras – Ricky Gervais More Practical Jokes Beautiful Celebrities Gone Obese Mouse Virus Funny Police Comments Practical Jokes Dove Evolution Spoof Can You Read This Blog Contact Us Home Funny Stuff Pillsbury Doughboy Obituary Calvin & Hobbes Snowman Cartoons Excerpts from Court Reporters Funny Easter Cartoons UPS Pilot Complaints Funny Computer Cartoons Colorado Barbie New Business Terms Funny Christmas Cartoons Finding Nemo End-of-the-Year Evaluations Asterisk Ian McKellen on Extras – Ricky Gervais More Practical Jokes Beautiful Celebrities Gone Obese Mouse Virus Funny Police Comments Practical Jokes Dove Evolution Spoof Can You Read This About Funny Biz Staff Team Blog Contact Us Home Funny Voicemail Messages Posted at 01:35h in Technology by Dave Carlson 0 Comments
I can't come to the phone now, so if, well, actually, I can come to the phone now, I mean, like, I'm at the phone now, recording this message, but I'm doing this now, while you're listening to it later, except for you I guess it's now, like, when you're listening to it ... now I'm confused ... leave a message and I'll explain later.