“So I start by talking as if I answered the phone, like: ‘Hello? It’s Tom, is anyone there?’” Fulton eagerly explained, unaware that no one would ever stay on the line long enough to hear the voicemail he spent his entire Sunday crafting. “But that’s the joke — it’s just a message! Whoever is calling will be talking to no one,” Fulton added, failing to recognize that he was actually talking to no one since his message would never be played back by anyone under any circumstances.
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Home / Uncategorized / 15 Hilariously Funny Voicemail Ideas – Make Yours Like These
Random facts could include their favorite movie, vacation spot, candy, or television show. Regardless of what you choose, it will surprise your caller and more than likely make them leave a message if they were considering hanging up.
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Here are some great examples of professional voicemail greetings that you can use in your business!
About the AuthorLenny Zeltser develops products and programs that use security to achieve business results. He is the CISO at Axonius and Faculty Fellow at SANS Institute. Lenny has been leading efforts to establish resilient security practices and solve hard security problems for over two decades. A respected author and practitioner, he has been advancing tradecraft and contributing to the community. His insights build upon real-world experience, a Computer Science degree from the University of Pennsylvania, and an MBA degree from MIT Sloan.
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When your business is closed for vacation or holidays, it’s imperative that you set appropriate expectations for a callback and to provide an alternative coverage option, if available. The following greeting accomplishes this succinctly.
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Wrap up with a call to action, an explicit call to action again speaking to their subconscious mind. So here's what you have to do next. Take a moment, leave me a message with your name, phone number twice, including your area code, the address of the property you're thinking of selling, your asking price. A lot of people don't like to include that because they don't want the seller fixating on a price. I like to know what's on their mind if they even have a starting point. You noticed, I don't say what you're asking, what, what you need to get for the property, because I'm probably not going to be able to offer them their asking price, but I'd like to know what, if anything, they have in mind.
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For many years, businesses in Fort Worth have relied on voicemail greetings to deliver a professional impression to callers. More recently, the voicemail greeting format has been adapted by businesses to communicate in-person visit information, special offers, and customer feedback.
25. "Hello! Thanks for reaching out to [company]. We're closed today for the holiday, and will reopen tomorrow. If you leave your name, number, and a brief message, we'll give you a call when we're back in the office. Thanks again, and have a great day."
Voicemail is necessary when no one can answer the phone. However, a dedicated receptionist can reduce the need for this feature and help people reach a live person. Consider live chat as well if your customers like to reach out online.
Hello. This is Ron's answering machine, Marvin, and I'm so depressed. I have 50,000 times the memory capacity of my owner, but all I get to do is answer the phone. Life. Don't talk to me about life. Just leave your name and number after the beep. Here comes the beep, Gosh how I hate that beep, it's so cheery sounding.
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You must have JavaScript enabled in your browser to utilize the functionality of this website. There are very few cases in which our telephone answering service would recommend having an antiquated voicemail answer your incoming calls.
Challenges never cease to arise when managing a business. Voicemails are often one of them, as they are rushed or fall under the shadow of more pressing matters. However, a salon voicemail greeting is an unmissable opportunity from a marketing point of view. It is as important as your website, your social media presence or even your logo! It’s part of your shopfront. Make sure it’s working FOR you, not AGAINST you.
A professional voicemail should be short and succinct. Simply introduce your company, ask the caller to leave their information, and let the caller know when to expect a callback. Once you record your greeting, you can easily upload it into the OpenPhone app. Simply go to your phone number’s settings, then choose to record a greeting, upload an mp3 file, or use text-to-speech.
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9. Outgoing Message with Samuel L. Jackson Treatment. Stephen Colbert asked Samuel L. Jackson to record his infamous voice on his outgoing message recording.
5. Voicemail Greetings For Vacation. As mentioned above, alerting callers that they won’t be getting an immediate call back is of upmost importance for an entity’s reputation and a caller’s satisfaction.
Voicemail greetings can include any information you’d wish to convey, such as special sales, bargains, alternate phone numbers to use, or your company’s normal working hours.
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9. "Hey, this is [your name]. Thanks for reaching out. I'm busy at the moment, but if you leave your name, number, and message, I'll return your call.”
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No7: You have reached 934-2435. We picked this machine up at a garage sale in "as-is" condition. You can try to leave a message on it, but we are not sure it will be recorded. If we don't return your call, it means the machine did not work.
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I am on H1 & my H1 (& visa stamping) expires in Apr 2009. My wife has H4 stamped on her passport until Apr 2009. My wife got her H1 approved in 2008 lottery with permit to start work starting October Ist, 2008. We are planning to take cruise to Bermuda from sep 28-oct 5. I just wanted to know , a) will her H4 stamping be expired on October 5, 2008 , as her H1 will become effective? c) or if someone knows whether she needs a valid visa stamping in accordance with her latest immigration status (h1 in this case on oct 5 , 2008) when returning to US in cruise.
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Not funny at all. More obnoxious then anything! I just hate those voice mails asking ME to call them back because they have “questions”. Got one yesterday… Bob, this is __________ I have a few questions, please call me at XXX_XXX_XXXX… and then when you call it’s a flipping company that knows NOTHING about what I do or even that they called me in the first place. Don’t know about you but I’m rather protective of my phone time. And yes, they could use a dose of Art & Sam’s seminar… Hey one in Phoenix in a couple weeks
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3. YouMail Robocall Blocker & Voicemail. YouMail is one amongst the great free visual voicemail app that acts as spammer and robocalls blocker to protect you from unwanted callers.
Dear Caller: As I'm leaving you this message, the sun is shining for a change. Little children are cavorting in the park, and their tasty mothers and teenage sisters are sunbathing practically nude. So, did you really think I was going to stick around this dump?
What’s more, according to WP Beginner, “more than 88% of local searches on mobile devices end up in a phone call,” so you don’t want to be caught off guard when a customer calls!
Well... All the points you describe are sufficient and up to the mark ..... its really great....Actually i have the same Problem and i also want some help i think this post helps me to overcome my problem.....Thanks for sharing this great thoughts with us....!! villa estartit (http://vakantiehuizenestartit.villamar.nl/findAllVillas.php?filter=Estartit&lang=nl) villa blanes (http://vakantiehuizenblanes.villamar.nl/findAllVillas.php?filter=Blanes&lang=nl ) Q1) I would like to take a US consulate appointment for visitor's visa for my father. We are from southern Andhra Pradesh and Chennai consulate is convenient for us. Since Hyderabad has US consulate, does whole of Andhra come under HYD consulate jurisdiction? or can we take appointment in Chennai Consulate? Could you please let me know? My father is going for visa for the first time. Q2) If visitor passport is expiring in next eight months and if the visitor is residing in US, is it possible to renew the passport here? Or the person has to go back to India and renew the passport there. I would just like to help my parents with the paper work and get it done if possible when they are here.
Hello. You’ve reached the establishment of Binder and Binder Law Offices in West Chapel. We regret we are not here to answer your call. However, your call is important to us, so please leave your contact information and a brief message at the tone, and we’ll get back to you shortly. It’s been a pleasure receiving your call.
Website: https://www.holdcom.com/script-samples/voicemail-greeting-sample-scripts/
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"John, this is Mark from Pinnacle. I've been working with Steve at JKY industries and It's urgent that I talk to you. You can reach me at 123 (pause 2 seconds) 456 (pause 1-2 second) 7890. That number again is 123.....456.....7890." Hangup.
Is your refrigerator running? You better go catch it! Corny jokes like this don't work anymore...and won't work in your voicemail greeting. Saying things like, "Hello, you've reach the machine that lives inside Mark's cell phone. Leave a message and I'll tell him!" are really unappealing and aren't even funny.
We hope you enjoyed these funny voicemail greetings! Since our business answering service is open 24 hours a day, you’ll never be greeted by a voicemail greeting requesting you to leave a message. However, our staff loves to have fun when we can so we hope these funny …
“Hi, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m away from[date] to [date]. If you need help with [X] before then, please contact [name] at [phone number]. Everyone else, please leave your name and number and I’ll return your call when I return. Thanks and have a great day.” “Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m currently [exploring Asia, hiking through the jungle in Costa Rica, hanging out on the beach in Bermuda] — or more likely, [recovering from extreme jet lag, googling ‘Are red spiders poisonous,’ or looking for SPF 150 sunscreen] and won’t be back in the office until [date]. Leave your contact info and reason for calling and I’ll get in touch then.” “Hey there, this is [your name] from [your company]. I’m out of the office until [date]. In the meantime, please direct your inquiries to [coworker’s name] at [email address]. [He, she] can also be reached at [phone number]. Thank you.”
Currently there are no lifeforms available to take your call but at the pre-arranged audio signal, please feel free to leave any verbal communication you feel is necessary.
5. Holiday Voicemail Greetings. Happy [X holiday]! You've reached [your name] at [X company]. I am currently out of the office, but please leave me your name, phone number, and the reason you are calling, and I’ll return your call after the holidays.
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When you create an electronic greeting, it’s important to practice or write down your message before recording it. Your message will feel more genuine if it flows and will be perceived better. Rehearsing might even help you find the perfect wording for you!
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I quite liked the ease of the script; not rushed and overbearing. It is like you are right there talking to me at the kitchen table. Slight grammatical error, it’s ” my wife and I” not “me and my wife.”
Oh lord…is it you…again? Well, if you must, leave a name and number after the beep. I’ll try to return the call, if I can stand it, that is.
No42: A bubble in the space-time continuum has connected your line to a channeler in the 23rd century. Any message you leave will be broadcast into the future.
Your business depends on customer engagement, and voicemail messages are a large part of that engagement. A voicemail is nothing more than a digital recording system, where messages are stored for you to retrieve later. Voicemail allows you to be able to connect with customers while you are away or during your off-hours, where they can drop off a message while you are gone. A voicemail greeting, on the other hand, refers to the message that your callers hear upon answering the phone.
38. Thanks for calling [company name]. We’re unable to take your call right now, but leave your details and we’ll call you right back.
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Oh lord…is it you…again? Well, if you must, leave a name and number after the beep. I’ll try to return the call, if I can stand it, that is.
Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous! Please leave your name, telephone number, and a brief message in a voice similar to mine, and your call will be returned as soon as humanly possible. This is Chris. This is his refrigerator. Hi, you have reached …. Please leave your name, phone number and a message and if we like it we will return your call. If you are calling to collect a student loan, gambling debt, or other obligation, please press 1 and hang up now.
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05You have reached the offices of [your company/business]. Unfortunately, we are currently closed. We are usually open between [hours] [days] and closed on [days]. Please leave us a message with your details and we will get back to you when the office opens. You may hang up after leaving your message or press the [key] for other options. Thank you for your call. This after-hours voicemail greeting lets callers know how to do business or communicate with you outside normal business hours. You may also like 6 How to Ask for a Raise Email Templates to Get Your Point Across
ProfileFriendsGroupsDiscussionsCommentsReading ChallengeKindle Notes & HighlightsQuotesFavorite genresFriends’ recommendationsAccount settingsHelpSign out Start by marking “No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages” as Want to Read: We’d love your help. Let us know what’s wrong with this preview of No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages by John Carfi. Problem: It’s the wrong book It’s the wrong edition Other Not the book you’re looking for? Preview — No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages by John Carfi liked it 3.00 · Rating details · 3 ratings · 1 review Published March 28th 1984 by CCC Publications (first published March 1984) 0918259002 (ISBN13: 9780918259004) To ask other readers questions about No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages, please sign up. Be the first to ask a question about No Hang-Ups Funny Answering Machine Messages This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Add this book to your favorite list » Aug 02, 2014 Kelly rated it liked it I like this book. Great, snarky answering machine messages. There's something so special about each class of debut YA authors; after all, young adult fiction is all about the hopefulness of new... Company About us Careers Terms Privacy Interest Based Ads Ad Preferences Help AirPods AirPods Max AirPods Pro Apple Car Apple Deals Apple Glasses Apple Pay Apple Pro Display XDR Apple TV Apple Watch SE Apple Watch Series 7 CarPlay HomePod HomePod mini iMac iOS 14 iOS 15 iPad iPad Air iPad mini iPad Pro iPadOS 14 iPadOS 15 iPhone 11 iPhone 12 iPhone 13 iPhone 13 Pro iPhone 14 iPhone SE 2020 iPod touch Mac mini Mac Pro MacBook Air MacBook Pro 13" MacBook Pro 16" macOS Big Sur macOS Monterey watchOS 7 watchOS 8 Home New Posts Forum List Trending New Threads New Media Spy New posts WikiPost Latest summaries Watched WikiPosts Support FAQ and Rules Contact Us Thread starter patrick0brien Start date Jun 14, 2006 Sort by reaction score
“This is Slappy McGee. Leave a brief message, telling me why you’re calling, and what’s in it for me. Unless you’re Boots, then DO NOT leave a message. I’m still trying to get rid of those fleas you gave me. Thanks a lot. Hashtag sarcasm.” 8. Tooth extraction “Did you get the part about the gravy?” Photo by Shutterstock
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2. Hello you’ve reached Matt Grech, I’ll be out of the office for the next few days due to the holidays. Feel free to leave a message, or you can shoot me an email at Matt@GetVoIP if something urgent pops up. I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as I return to the office. Happy holidays!
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nothing too crazy in terms of actual content, but my brother and i recorded our message in irish accents a while back, which was quite fun. we fooled plenty of people (i'm sure had any true irish folk called, they'd have vomited at the poor accent impersonations!) Aug 1, 2004 19,801 8 The City of Culture, Englandshire I did one once where I just said "hello?" - then paused for a few seconds and continued ... Quite a few people said they started talking before being interrupted by me telling them to leave a message! I've heard messages like that before although they've kept on saying "hello?" a few times (louder and louder) to make you think that they've actually answered the phone but they can't hear you.
I can voice a custom voicemail greeting to fit your corporate, small business, or personal phone. Make your phone greeting stand out to your callers with a professional voiceover for whatever you need said, including prompts for extensions and personalize each line with a name or department.
The above eight rules of engagement for voicemail greetings may sound easy enough, but they’ll require some practice to get just right. Let’s look at some examples to provide some context in how to apply the rules to various types of greetings and situations.
Creating a voicemail greeting might not be fun, but with the scripts I’ve shared, you should have an easier time. No need to practice time and time again — simply plug in your name, company title, and other details, then read it out loud to your phone’s voicemail greeting recorder. With a professional greeting, you’ll continue nurturing prospects even if you don’t pick up the phone.
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Here are some of the examples. ! Best Voicemail Greetings ! These voicemail greeting ideas will be your help to inform the callers that you are not available, you are doing something or you are out of the office. ! 1. Hi! You have reached voicemail of (your name), (job title). I …
You voice message greetings are supposed to be fun, energetic, and witty so that the callers want to pick up their phones and give you a call just so they can listen to the greeting again.
And now, a number of links that will introduce you to some cute videos posted on YouTube: How it works The message (examples/idea) English or foreign voices Background music Technical data Price FAQs Extra Funny voicemail message Install messages Set messages for Asterisk Switchboard voicemail catalogue Become affiliated Are you a switchboard manufacturer? Our APIs Home About us Our addresses How we work Satisfied customers How it works The message (examples/idea) English or
Concatenation of events preclude our coming to the phone. Please speak freely, with magniloquence upon occasion of the tone.
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Departments and teams are typically organized by function – customer service, tech support, sales, billing questions, etc. When a team is busy handling other calls, encourage your callers to leave a message and reassure them that you will get back to them within a reasonable time frame. It’s important that you actually follow through to avoid upsetting your callers.
