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Thank you for calling [LinkedPhone – Where Freedom Rings!]. You’ve reached us outside of business hours. Please select from one of the following options: [for business hours press 1; to leave a message press 2; if this is an emergency, press 0 to be directed to our 24-hour customer success team.] We are grateful for your call and we look forward to speaking with you soon!

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Hey, who’s this? I’d actually pick up, but my phone is staring at me. OMG! I just saw it wink!
Please leave your name, phone number, and a short message and I'll be sure to return your call. Hi, this is [your name] at [X company]. I am unavailable at the moment, but please leave your name, phone number, and the reason you’re calling, and I’ll call you right back. Hi, you’ve called [your name] at [X company]. .

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(Kazoo band playing "Thus Spake Zarathustra") Thinking you were making an ordinary phone call, you have instead reached... (TA-DAAAAA!) the ANSWERING MACHINE! Leave your name and number, and we will get back to you as soon as we can. Steve: You fool, I know it's... Wait... Matt... What are you doing with that frying pan? (BONK... THUD) Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I'm home right now, and in a moment, I'll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I'll be thinking about it... Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say? (Fun to leave on a friend's machine when he's away... Sounds of raptuous sex) Hi. Mike can't come to the phone right now because he's having sex. If you leave your name and number, he'll get back with you in juuust a second. (Male groan; female voice) That's it?You're in Big Trouble Hello! I'm on a four state killing spree! WATTA YA WANT? (Voice 2) These are the messages of Chad's answering machine. Its two semester mission: To seek out your name and your telephone number. At the sound of the... This is 234-3249, and no, it's not Pete's Pizzeria. It's not the Credit Union either, and no one named Pam lives here. You can leave a message though. Hi. Do you ever feel, like, your head is full of sand, not your regular loose sand mind you, but compacted sand, and there were like, I dunno, bugs or something jumping up and down on the compacted sand? Well, sometimes I do. Bye. Bullwinkle: Hey, Rocky, somebody called while we weren't home. Watch me pull their message out of this machine! Bullwinkle: Nuthin' up my sleeve... PRESTO! (Sound of vicious dog barking, stops abruptly.) Rocky: Here's a chance for you to REALLY leave your message. (A friend was at a mutual friend's sister's house, and when she went out for beer, he changed her answering machine message. In a loud, deep, gravelly, horror-film voice he recorded) Hi, this is Kathy. I'm not myself right now. If you leave your name and number, I'll get back to you when I'm feeling better.Farewell These words are lovely dark and deep
9. Funny Voicemail Examples. 26. Hello, you’ve reached [your name]. I’m either on another call, on a top secret mission to Mars, or I’ve just stepped away from my desk for the day.

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Your goal for improving your business voicemail messages is to have more callers ring back or return your calls, so it follows that you also have to check your own voicemails frequently. It’s not just enough for you to be the one to ring and send voicemail messages. When would-be customers are convinced about your products and services to the point that they’ve returned your calls, you now have to take your customer service to the next step.
17. "Hello! You've gotten the voicemail of [your name]. Leave your name, contact info, and the answer to the eternal question ‘Which came first, the chicken or the egg?' Anyone who gets it right will receive a call back."

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13Please repeat the captcha below [utter captcha] to confirm you are not a robot before being allowed to leave a message at [your name]’s voicemail. This is a great copy of the internet’s way of cracking down on spam and robots. Callers will be left repeating the captcha unknowingly. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you leave me a voicemail, then that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you and I will call you. This is a classic line from the movie Taken (without the violence). Your callers will always get startled at the threat initially but will surely leave them in jitters as they drop a message in your voicemail. This is a classic trick and one that is both funny and frustrating. Watching people continue to speak as if you’re there is funny. Make sure they know when to leave a message though. You may also like 10 Great Templates: How to Say Thank You for Your Order to Customers

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Does your iphone need to be jailbroken to do this? I know it has to be jailbroken to run idemo with it.

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    If they don’t leave a message, you’ll never know who called. Some people may assume they should just call back later. But if you prefer to get back to them at your leisure, encourage them to leave a message.

    Before we get into business voicemail greetings, here are some interesting facts about voicemail messages to think about. 75% of all business calls are not completed on the first attempt. Which is an example of a professional voicemail greeting? Professional voicemail greeting examples to boost your credibility.
    Check for outages and troubleshoot problems with your home phone or internet service.

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    Ooma voicemail app is among best voicemail app android providing high degree of flexibility. The app offers its users with high-quality voicemail and all-around phone services from anywhere. You can manage your voicemails efficiently and effectively with this app. Ooma allows you to delete, compile, and listen to all voicemails easily.

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    4.) Benvenuti alla John Doe. Potete raggiugerci personalmente durante il nostro orario d’ufficio, dal Lunedì al Giovedì dalle 9am a mezzogiorno e dalle 2pm alle 4pm, e il Venerdì dalle 9am a mezzogiorno. Siete invitati a riferirci la vostra richiesta tramite e-mail a: [email protected] e vi risponderemo al più presto possibile - Grazie.

  • how do i setup my voicemail on my alcatel flip phone

    I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you. Categories: Funny Thoughts , Telephone Jokes ( Answering Machine Jokes ) Share Via. E-Mail.

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  • what to say in your business voicemail

    9.) Herzlich Willkommen bei der Mustermann GmbH. Leider ist unser Büro zur Zeit nicht besetzt. Bitte hinterlassen Sie uns nach dem Signalton Ihren Namen und Ihre Telefonnummer. Wir rufen Sie gerne zurück.

    Don’t wait submit your script and receive an instant no-obligation price quote online!
    07Thank you for calling [business name]. I’m out assisting other clients with their goals, at the moment, but look forward to attending to you. Please leave a message and I’ll return your call within one business day. To schedule an appointment press 1. This is an example of an industry-specific voicemail greeting. This voicemail gives specific and clear instructions to the callers.

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6. "Hi, this is [your name]. I'm either on a call or away from my desk. Please leave your name, number, and a brief message and I'll get back to you. Thank you."

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Here’s a simple clinician voicemail script if you want to keep your message to the point. Hello. You’ve reached Highland Family Counseling Services. We are currently unable to take your call, so please state your name, phone number, and a detailed message after the beep. We will return all …

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8. General Purpose Holiday Hours Script. Thank you for calling [Company Name]. In observance of [holiday], our offices are currently closed. We’ll be back to normal operations on [date].

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@BizClassifieds I’m glad it helped. It was so annoying not being able to figure it out. Now, if there were a free app solution for doing this, you could make as many different voicemail messages for countless Skype answering messages, as you wanted. If I find one, I’ll let you know about it here!

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