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Funny voicemail messages are an excellent alternative for people that are looking for that unique touch for something that seems really mundane. If you’re having trouble coming up with your own then you can check out some of the funny voicemail messages below.
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19. “Thank you for calling [company]. We’re closed for [holiday] from [date] until [date]. Please leave your message and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible. Have a happy holiday!”
(Kazoo band playing "Thus Spake Zarathustra") Thinking you were making an ordinary phone call, you have instead reached... (TA-DAAAAA!) the ANSWERING MACHINE! Leave your name and number, and we will get back to you as soon as we can. Steve: You fool, I know it's... Wait... Matt... What are you doing with that frying pan? (BONK... THUD) Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I'm home right now, and in a moment, I'll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I'll be thinking about it... Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say? (Fun to leave on a friend's machine when he's away... Sounds of raptuous sex) Hi. Mike can't come to the phone right now because he's having sex. If you leave your name and number, he'll get back with you in juuust a second. (Male groan; female voice) That's it?You're in Big Trouble Hello! I'm on a four state killing spree! WATTA YA WANT? (Voice 2) These are the messages of Chad's answering machine. Its two semester mission: To seek out your name and your telephone number. At the sound of the... This is 234-3249, and no, it's not Pete's Pizzeria. It's not the Credit Union either, and no one named Pam lives here. You can leave a message though. Hi. Do you ever feel, like, your head is full of sand, not your regular loose sand mind you, but compacted sand, and there were like, I dunno, bugs or something jumping up and down on the compacted sand? Well, sometimes I do. Bye. Bullwinkle: Hey, Rocky, somebody called while we weren't home. Watch me pull their message out of this machine! Bullwinkle: Nuthin' up my sleeve... PRESTO! (Sound of vicious dog barking, stops abruptly.) Rocky: Here's a chance for you to REALLY leave your message. (A friend was at a mutual friend's sister's house, and when she went out for beer, he changed her answering machine message. In a loud, deep, gravelly, horror-film voice he recorded) Hi, this is Kathy. I'm not myself right now. If you leave your name and number, I'll get back to you when I'm feeling better.Farewell These words are lovely dark and deep
The Best Way to Set up a Voicemail Greeting. Normally, small business owners use a landline or mobile phone number to manage calls. While it may get the job done, they do not allow you to properly manage business calls or set up an effective automated voicemail greeting. The best way to manage business calls is by using a business phone service.
Pepperdine's unified messaging system, Unity, is provided for employees of the University. This message system allows employees to access voicemail messages through both the telephone and email. Students who wish to have a voicemail must complete a voicemail request form at OneStop.
4. The Urgency. When we ratchet up the urgency by adding a timeline (and even a little mystery), we astronomically increase our odds of someone dialing us immediately after getting the message.
Try to avoid unnecessary phrases that only make your greeting longer, like “leave your name and number and what you’re calling about.” Most people know what “leave a message” means.
Visual Voicemail is a feature on iPhones that allows iOS to transcribe the voicemails people leave for you. This way you can read the voicemail like a text message instead of having to listen to it.
Business voicemail greetings are rarely thought of as a prime way to connect with customers. But just because you're not available doesn't mean you can't make a positive impression on your customers when they reach your voicemail box.
Calling your retrieval number — instead of your home phone number — is a faster way to listen to your messages remotely. You will be prompted immediately to enter your PIN and don't have to wait for your greeting to start.
Reassuring the caller that they contacted the correct number or reached the person they intended helps reduce the number of hang-ups and wasted messages you’ll receive. Here are a few notes on how to leave the best greeting possible, along with some voicemail message examples you can use in your own company!
Practice makes perfect. Again, another obvious one, but it has to be stressed. If you want your voicemail greetings to come off as genuine, you have to practice. If you simply throw together a greeting that sounds and feels rushed, your customers aren’t going to let you get away with it. You will come off as if you don’t really care, and that won’t convince anyone you’re prioritizing the customer experience.
What voice do you want to convey when speaking with customers? This may be professional, casual, or even humorous.
And here are some sample voicemail greeting scripts for doctors, lawyers, and dentists, in case you're not looking for business greetings. 1. Personal Business Voicemail Greeting. Your personal voicemail greeting should be brief and to the point. State your name and your availability, project a welcoming aura, and ask the caller for whatever
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Our final sample voicemail greeting for business is the one to use when you want to discourage someone from leaving a message, for example, when you are fielding inquiries from job applicants. We hope that you have found these voicemail greetings for business informative, if …