Funny voicemail greetings are just that. These types of greetings have no rules whatsoever. They’re just for funsies, so make those you care for the laugh. Most of the time, they are personal, but certain businesses can use them as well. Perhaps you operate a theatrical costume company that specializes in clown memorabilia, or perhaps you run a business that sells pranks, such as plastic puppy poo, and whoopee cushions.
9.) Welcome to John Doe. Unfortunately, there is no one in the office right now. Please leave your name and phone number after the tone. We will call you back as soon as possible.

You may think your voicemail message is professional. But when you listen back it could sound rushed or shaky. Listen to it regularly to see if changes are needed.
Home | Directory | News | Newsgroups | Tools | Resources | Glossary | Site Map Featuring Voice Mail Information, News, and Resources Voice Mail Services | Voice Mail Systems | Voice Mail Related | Free Voicemail Sample Greetings Sample Voice Mail Greetings A Word About Recording Your Greetings Your voicemail greeting is very important as it can be the first contact people have with you or your company. Your greeting should let the caller know who they have reached, what your status is (out of the office, in the office but in meetings, etc), when the caller can expect to receive a call back, and instructions on what to do if the call is urgent. If you have set up a personal operator, you can direct your callers who need to speak to someone immediately, to "Press 0" to be connected to one of your assistants or colleagues. Another way to make sure that your callers are informed while you are out of the office is to use a Temporary Absence Greeting. For example, if you are going to be out of town on vacation for a week, you can record a Temporary Absence Greeting informing callers that you will be unable to return their call until you return from vacation. Write down your greetings before you start. It is easier to read from the page than to try and ad lib. Here are a few sample voice mail greetings to get you started: Normal Greeting (Without pager notification) "This is (name) of (company). I'm currently unable to take your call. Please leave your name, phone number, and a brief message, and I will contact you as soon as possible. Thanks." "Hi, this is (name). I�m sorry I cannot take your call right now. Please leave a detailed message at the tone along with your name and telephone number. I �ll return your call as soon as I return. Thank you." "This is (name) of (company). I'm currently unable to take your call. Please leave your name, phone number, and your message, and I will contact you as soon as possible. If this message is urgent, press 3 to have me paged. Thanks." Normal Greeting (With Live Connect) "This is (name) of (company). I'm currently unable to take your call. Please leave your name, phone number, and your message, and I will contact you as soon as possible. If this is urgent and you need to speak with me immediately, please press 1 to have the voice mail locate me. Thanks." "This is (name) of (company). I'm currently on my line and unable to take your call. Please leave your name, phone number, and your message, and I will contact you as soon as possible. Thanks." "Hello, you have reached the office of (name) . I�m presently on another call and am unable to speak with you personally. If you will leave your name and telephone number, I will return your call. Thank you. "This is (name) of (company). I'm currently away from my desk and unable to take your call. Please leave your name, phone number, and your message, and I will contact you as soon as I return. Thanks." "Hello, you have reached the office of (name) . I�m presently out of the office or away from my desk. If you will leave your name and telephone number I will return your call as soon as I return. Thank you. "Thanks for calling, this is (name). Today is Friday and I am working from our corporate office. Should you need to reach me immediately, please call (123) 456-7899. Otherwise, please leave me a message and I�ll return your call as soon as possible." "Hello, this is (name). I�m unable to answer your telephone call. I am out of the office from (day) to (day) and will not be checking my voice mail. If you require assistance in my absence please contact (name2) at extension (ext. #). Thank you. "This is (name) from (company). I have left the office for the day. Please leave me a message and I will return your call as soon as possible." Sample �Business Hours� Greeting Script: Thank you for calling XYZ Company. If you know the extension number of the person you are trying to reach, you may dial it now. Press 1 for sales. Press 2 for customer service. Press 3 for the billing department. Press 8 to access our fax on-demand system. Press 9 for a company directory, or press 0 for the operator. Sample �After Hours� Greeting Script: Thank you for calling XYZ Company. We are currently unavailable to take your call. Our business hours are nine to five, Monday through Friday. If you know the extension number of the person you are trying to leave a message for, you may dial it now. Press 1 for sales. Press 2 for customer service. Press 3 for the billing department. Press 9 for a company directory, or hold to leave a message for the operator. If this is an emergency, please enter 911 now to be connected with the after-hours support personnel. More info Copyright © 2012 Everyvoicemail.com ~ 5089 Bristol Industrial Way, Ste C ~ Buford, GA 30518 ~ 678.318.1300